A hodge-podge of thoughts . . .

A really good friend recently reminded me that this experience shouldn't be about taking a clipboard with me and trying to pre-determine whether or not the next guy I meet is "the one." Usually it's only when someone is not intensely looking that someone pops up out of the woodwork, takes you completely by surprise and you end up falling for them in a way you couldn't before imagine. I just need to have a little fun with things, not take them so seriously and enjoy going out and meeting new people (and having NO expectations!)

So I'm trying to keep that perspective as I go forward. I also wanted to apologize for this blog taking a slightly depressing/snappish/bitter tone in the last few entries. I just get frustrated when people tell me that I'm picky or that I should give people more chances. I kind of equate dating to finding a job and I spent 4 years of my life being miserable in a job that I kept doing because I was a) scared to find something else, b) I knew I was good at and c) people kept encouraging me to stay in BECAUSE I was good at it! I can't do that with dating. I honestly believe that when I meet someone with whom I feel comfortable and want to know better, I'll have that safe feeling in my stomach and won't find crazy things about them annoying.

So a few more anecdotes about the teacher . . . when we went to dinner the other night (and did I mention that he's super skinny . . . to the point where I think that he might actually be anorexic . . . he's also an INCREDIBLY slow eater, which I'm the complete opposite of so I found rather annoying) he scrutinized the menu and then did a When Harry Met Sally and found one item and ordered it completely different from what it was like on the menu. He also seriously wanted me to praise him for trying his green beans (uh . . . really? I'm not your mom!). He actually questioned the soup I ordered because he thought the ingredients in it sounded scary (yes . . . tortilla soup has some frightening things in it . . . ). In particular he was afraid of the type of chiles in it. Yeah . . . and if that wasn't enough he then proceeded to embark on a discussion about his attire (purchased from Banana Republic) and shoes (nice Italian leather). I can't date someone who is more of a girl than I am. I think that the final straw for me must have been when he was talking about the new thermostat he needed to install in his house and how his friend was going to do it for him because he didn't want to figure out how himself. SERIOUSLY? I guess that's what you can expect from someone whose mother did his laundry until he was 25 and still does it occasionally.

My girl gay vibe is seriously pointing to yes on this one . . . I think he just doesn't know it yet. I just can't imagine feeling safe or secure with him. I think I would constantly have to be taking care of him and that is not something I would want to do!

It's funny that those words just came out because when I'm with someone I truly like, I don't mind doing things for them. I once spent an entire day cleaning a boyfriend's new apartment and doing about 10 loads of laundry for him. So I can let down my guard and I can open up to someone but it has to be someone that I feel comfortable with and maybe for me, that's a very select group of people.

Anyway, I've got a few more eligible bachelors in the queue so we'll see if their responses spark some interest . . .