oh the trials . . .

Why is it that when you want something and try really hard to find it, it just isn't there and then when you stop wanting it something usually pops up that isn't what you were expecting and certainly doesn't fit your mold of what you were looking for?

That always seems to happen to me with regards to dating. I've been very turned off by the online dating recently; probably due to the fact that I seem to work with all these really great (taken/off limits) guys and I just wish that I could find someone like one of them but that is not someone with whom I work.

We got information about our Christmas party today and I'm already dreading it. I so don't want to go by myself and yet I sincerely doubt that I'll actually be dating anyone around that time either (that gives me about 7 weeks to meet, start dating, and like someone enough to invite them to the event). And there are a few single guys there and maybe we could all just go together but I don't know if I can bring that up for a whole host of reasons. Maybe when it gets a little closer people will start talking about it and I can jump in on a conversation . . . sometimes working with all men can be a little (or a lot) frustrating!

In other news . . . there is a new online guy who just emailed me and I find mildly interesting. He's from a small town in KS and just moved back here after heading out to Las Vegas for about a year. He's a former elementary teacher turned power company employee . . . whatever . . . I could use the distraction of someone available at the moment so if he suggests going out I'll probably take him up on it!

I think online dating has one fatal flaw for me . . . I miss the game. I miss the chase. I miss the flirting and the banter and the anticipation of when I'm going to see him again and how I'm going to make him ask me out. Does that make me wierd? Maybe it means I'm not ready for a real relationship . . . I don't know. I do know that I know what it feels like to be head over heels completely attracted to someone and that is definitely what I look for/need in order to want to date someone.